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Let's Rewrite English Grammar!

6K views 70 replies 13 participants last post by  pm-r 
#1 ·
Languages change over time, and so do the rules of those languages. I was wondering what rules eMac'ers would change in the English language if they could write new rules.

As an example, I would change all the rules with the verb Be, no more I am, He or she is, they are etc... it would be I be working, she be here, they be there...

Your turn..
 
#4 ·
An interesting question, Rp. Part of me agrees with Macfury, maybe because I use grammar well now ............... but if I was learning to speak once again, and my parents used the "new grammar", I wonder if learning to speak well would have come easier?

"I done did it good when I learn to talk way back then ............ so why change when there not reason to change how I talk good ....................... even with a New York City accent?" :D
 
#11 ·
Well, my faddah ust to sell boids on toidy toid street. :D
 
#6 ·
I like the "because" phrase, where it's not necessary to spell out the whole argument every time. As in, climate change is a very real problem in our world today. Because science.

















(let's see if the predictable reaction comes...)


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#8 ·
I like the "because" phrase, where it's not necessary to spell out the whole argument every time. As in, climate change is a very real problem in our world today. Because science.
That's fine for casual conversation among people who agree with each other. Not sure it would work in any formal sense.

In response, the rational person might say: "Climate change is not a real problem in our world today. Because science." I'm not sure that this brand of grammar would do much but identify tribes. How about some other examples:

The Roman Empire fell. Because history.
12 + 3 = 19. Because math.
Are these OK?
 
#10 ·
I tell my students there are 3 types of English... Friendspeak, which is what they use with their friends and family; Common, which is what we hear on broadcasts or read in newspapers; and Formal,, used when communicating with people of respect or authority. Maybe we could eliminate Common and Formal. Business letters would be a lot shorter and I be in favour of that.
 
#12 ·
Although I agree with what you are saying in general in terms of language always changing, I do not like the example that you provided. I think that the English language is already one of the most accommodating languages when it comes to being verbal or written despite the "rules".

The English spoken/written language tends to just "get on with it" and absorbs most of what comes its way and is more interested in understanding and communication rather than "rules" of grammar.

So I don't have any specific suggestions at this point, but it is a very good thought experiment. I will ruminate on it some and post again when I can up with some specific examples/suggestions.
 
#15 ·
Hi Screature, how about text short cuts. LOL, LMAO, MILF, do we accept those as acceptable since they are widely used..... just a question.
 
#17 ·
And then there's the abbrevs for the old folks.

FWIW: Forgot Where I Was

BTW: Bring The Wheelchair

ROFL... CGU: Rolling On The Floor Laughing... And Can't Get Up

DWI: Driving While Incontinent

LOL: Living On Lipitor

OMG: Oy, My Grandchildren!

OMG: Ouch, My Groin!

IMHO: Is My Hearing-Aid On?

WTF: What's Today's Fish?

WTF: Wet The Furniture

IMHMO: In My HMO...

RULKM: Are You Leaving Kids Money?

BYOT: Bring Your Own Teeth

GTG: Gotta Groan

TGIF: Thank Goodness It's Four (Four O'Clock - Early Bird Special)

FWB: Friend With Betablockers

FYI: For Your Indigestion...

JK: Just Kvetching

TTYL: Talk To You Louder

MILF: Meal I'd Like To Forget

LMDO: Laughing My Dentures Out

LWO: Lawrence Welk's On

MGAD: My Grandson's A Doctor

SUS: Speak Up, Sonny

WIWYA: When I Was Your Age

GOML: Get Off My Lawn


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#46 ·
That reminds me of the story about Quebec Government regulations trying to limit ships docking during the summer in Quebec City. It was roundly defeated as they were against berth control.
 
#49 ·
Yes, our usage standard is funny. We ride on a train, on a plane,or on a bus, in a car. We never ride in a train or in a plane or in a bus or on a car.
 
#53 ·
Riding on a bus may date from Victorian London’s omnibuses. (People paid to ride up there?)

Flying on a plane came about when the horse pulling the omnibus morphed into Pegasus and flew to freedom — along with the passengers.

It’s a little-known fact that they all fell into the channel when Pegasus flew upside down. That’s why we know so little about it.

Nuclear-powered aircraft carriers still sail (as do submarines, which is very expensive because all that canvas rots inside of a week under water and it’s hellish trying not to fall off the ratlines while setting rotting topsails in bare feet half a mile down), we still type on computers and videos are still taped.

How can anyone be in bare feet, anyway?
 
#54 ·
In the "wonder what they meant by that" department....

The owner of a very small company got a letter from the labor board. They asked "How many employees do you have, broken down by sex". He answered "None that I know of. Alcohol is the big problem here"
 
This post has been deleted
#61 · (Edited)
Certainly puts Canada’s issues in perspective, and makes me wonder even more why some people refuse to get vaccinated here.


And it is very unfortunate that such people will no doubt and very likely end up in the hospital having their resources wasted on them but at least they shouldn't be a burden on anyone worrying about them not getting their injection as the virus will no doubt just eventually eliminate them from being a burden on anyone. It's too bad that they may end up wasting some of the hospital's resources and expenses.

Or maybe their estate should be held responsible and made to repay all of the Hospital expenses that they wasted, then some might smarten up a bit. But who needs even more idiots among us???



- Patrick
=======
 
#66 ·
Indeed, I find English grammar kind of difficult. I was really struggling when I was in middle school. My mom used to make me take tutor lessons only so that I am not the last one in my class. For some reason, English grammar and literature was not my cup of tea. If anyone of you is struggling as well, I know a great website that helps with these issues. For example, it has great theme worksheets in order to help you practice. If you are motivated enough, this online platform will help you tremendously. I worked with it for six months, and after this period of time, I improved my grades considerably. Just sharing this here, because sharing is caring.
 
#67 ·
What an inspiring story! I guess this situation is far more common than one would think, since the exact same thing, with the exact same grammar happened to another poster here a month ago.

[URL='https://www.ehmac.ca/goto/post?id=2737214']Roberterop[/URL] said:
SNIP If anyone of you is struggling as well, I know a great website that helps with these issues. SNIP
 
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