The nerve of some people.

My son plays poker at the local casino so he uses his comp account to get me meal tickets at tickets to the show lounge.

I can't be bothered with complicated logistics so I asked one of my neighbors to go with me. She likes the shows, I dont have to go alone, my son freely gives us the tickets, everybody should be happy. Right? Wrong.

So far we've gone to two shows (tickets about $40 each) dinner twice (about $20 each) and all I asked is that she pay the cab fare.

We have tickets to see Randy Travis on June 6 and we will also have dinner before the show.

Today when I saw this "friend" at the coffee table, she asked me when the show is, I told her and then she said, "ok, this time I'll pay the cab one way and you pay the other way."

I reminded her that her ticket is worth $80 and she'll be getting a free meal. She said "well Randy (my son) doesn't pay for the tickets."

Too late I realized that I should have said "when your son gives me an $80 ticket to a show, I'll pay all the cab and even buy your dinner."

Sigh.

Maybe I'm wrong? Opinions?

Margaret

I can't stand people like that. Cut your losses and find someone who's thoughtful.

Those people generally end up out of my life for good.

I'm on your side of this, Margaret.... my parents are going through something somewhat similar with my cousins. Drives us all nuts. Just because something doesn't have a cost, doesn't mean that it doesn't have a value.

I'm with you, Margaret. Take a photo of your friend and paste it next to the word "ingrate" in the dictionary.

I agree with the above posters, find a more appreciative individual to take along.

OMG, i am sorry but I had such a good laugh.. it reminded me of a Larry David or Sienfield episode.
I say dump the friend and find a new one with etiquette instilled in them..
As I have always said.. there is no such thing as a free lunch..

You should of never mentioned that you got the tickets for free, for those with no etiquette automatically imply they are deserving to come along at no cost. But there is no such thing as no cost - as you said cab fares, tips for dinner and any other extras.. I always assume everything is 'dutch - 50/50' or some cost to an event.

You have two options - be up front with the person and say I arranged a great evening out and if you could cover the cab fare, or if they are difficult split the cab fare at least.. [ find a new friend after.. but don't let that ruin a fun filled evening with Randy Travis.] Sorry but only country I can listen to is - Shania Twain .. [please don't judge]

When I was growing up - my parents always told us - don't be cheap it will bite you back..
I have friends that i know over 28 years.. - every time we went out to dinner - we split the bill; no one questioned anything.. or sometimes I treat or they treated but we never worried about it.. those are friends you keep.. But now that we all have kids, we all ask for separate bills LOL.. but we all have a great times..

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Randy does "pay" for the tickets through giving his business to the casino. I'm sure he spends enough there if he has a comp account.

Likewise, as Sonal said, the tickets have value and could be monetized by selling them to another person, especially at a discount.

Perhaps someone else would be interested the other meal and show tickets at a discounted rate in the future. It would sure help to pay the cab fare!

Meanwhile, this "friend" is clearly missing the value of the gift you are giving her and therefore, not even trying to give in return. Sheesh!

I have to disagree with the majority. The tickets cost you nothing and you are capitalizing on top of that by making the other person pay to take advantage of your "generosity". I think YOU should pay for the next cab ride there AND back, and then begin splitting the cab fare beyond that.

I have to disagree with the majority. The tickets cost you nothing and you are capitalizing on top of that by making the other person pay to take advantage of your "generosity". I think YOU should pay for the next cab ride there AND back, and then begin splitting the cab fare beyond that.

Is your real name Evelyn?

I might be more forgiving if I had begged her to come with me, but she hounded me daily to get the tickets. I reminded her several times how expensive they were, but still she hounded me.

Maybe Randy didn't have to reach in his pocket to comp us the tickets, but his comp account is down that much which means he won't be able to use the comp himself or comp other more appreciative friends. The tickets have value which she made clear she wanted.

Another time, she and a couple of other friends were going to a show and dinner. She asked me to get some comp coupons for them. I did. Nobody thanked me. I wasn't invited.

Sorry G-Mo. She wanted to go. She's putting no effort into it, she pays the cab.

The sad thing is that we live in this seniors apartment building and we will be neighbors for a long time.

how much is the cab ride?

the thing to consider is perhaps your friend doesn't feel the night out is worth what she has to pay for the cab ride. even if the face value is $80 for the performance, and $20 for the dinner, perhaps she only feels the entertainment and meal is worth $20 (or other relatively less amount) in her opinion.

Probably best to see if another friend would be interested. it seems this friend doesn't see the value in the deal being offered.

I regularly get sports tickets (Leafs, Raptors, Jays, TFC) from my Dad's company, some with face value of $300-400, and if my wife is not keen on going, I put out the word to see if anyone is interested in attending, I guess it's just me, but I wouldn't think of asking the reciepient of the other ticket to carry my expenses in getting to or from the event... I just can't fathom capitalizing on someone else's generosity, it's beyond me.

The nerve of some people.

My son plays poker at the local casino so he uses his comp account to get me meal tickets at tickets to the show lounge.

I can't be bothered with complicated logistics so I asked one of my neighbors to go with me. She likes the shows, I dont have to go alone, my son freely gives us the tickets, everybody should be happy. Right? Wrong.

So far we've gone to two shows (tickets about $40 each) dinner twice (about $20 each) and all I asked is that she pay the cab fare.

We have tickets to see Randy Travis on June 6 and we will also have dinner before the show.

Today when I saw this "friend" at the coffee table, she asked me when the show is, I told her and then she said, "ok, this time I'll pay the cab one way and you pay the other way."

I reminded her that her ticket is worth $80 and she'll be getting a free meal. She said "well Randy (my son) doesn't pay for the tickets."

Too late I realized that I should have said "when your son gives me an $80 ticket to a show, I'll pay all the cab and even buy your dinner."

Sigh.

Maybe I'm wrong? Opinions?

Margaret

Why don't you just bring someone else instead? Or would that create even more awkwardness?

De-friend her.

People like that are not worth the energy you spend feeling bad about the situation.

I regularly get sports tickets (Leafs, Raptors, Jays, TFC) from my Dad's company, some with face value of $300-400, and if my wife is not keen on going, I put out the word to see if anyone is interested in attending, I guess it's just me, but I wouldn't think of asking the reciepient of the other ticket to carry my expenses in getting to or from the event... I just can't fathom capitalizing on someone else's generosity, it's beyond me.

But in this case, she's capitalizing on my sons generosity. SHE came to me and asked for tickets.

It would be different if I had the tickets and needed someone to go with me, but she hounded me for weeks to get the tickets.

I can't ask someone else at this point, it would be extremely awkward.

And my son does pay for the tickets. His comp account is now depleted to the tune of $200 plus dollars which means he doesn't have enough in his account if he wants dinner or a show for his friends.

She obviously doesn't value the evening, but she knows that for her to have dinner and to see Randy Travis without me, it would cost her over a hundred dollars. Return cab fare is $15.

As you might imagine, there is more to this story with me always on the paying end.

This reminds me of a situation when I was working. Employee "A" says he has a coupon for a two for one meal deal. He asks employee "B" if he wants to buy this meal for his supper.

Employee "B" says sure he would enjoy that meal. Employee "A" gets the money from employee "B" and brings back his food and a meal for himself. Employee "B" asks "where is my change?"

Employee "A" say "what change?" I had the coupon and you were buying your supper anyway.

Don't assume anything. Spell out the deal.

Margaret, I should think you should tell "your friend" how you believe the arrangement should work. The comp has monetary value even if it did not cost you anything out of pocket.

If "Evelyn" can't see the value or feels the value of the arrangement is not to her satisfaction, then she should shop around for an acquaintance that can provide a meal and a show and a one way taxi fare.

Until such time as she may find such a friend (an arrangement) she should be advised you provide the tickets and she provide the transportation be it a taxi (or a suitable ride) this is the last best offer on the table and the offer perishes and provide a definite date and time that the offer is withdrawn.

If done in a timely manner this may provide you with an opportunity to have another person enjoy the night out for the cost of a round trip taxi fare.

All good advice. I can't unfriendly her, but I won't be a close friend. Perhaps I wasn't clear about how Randy gets the tickets and that it actually does cost him over time.

The casino regularly sends out booklets of coupons for $5 of a meal or a table game etc. those are "free" in that you don't do anything to get them, they come in the mail like flyers for the drugstore. Even though I've explained it to her, she might not understand. There is also a handicapped husband lurking in the wings. I sense he's had some input into the cab situation.

Meanwhile, I'm cleaning out closets and hauling usable stuff down to the giveaway table in the lobby. Guess who is taking most of it. :D

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sudo rm -rf /

Is your real name Evelyn?

I might be more forgiving if I had begged her to come with me, but she hounded me daily to get the tickets. I reminded her several times how expensive they were, but still she hounded me.

Maybe Randy didn't have to reach in his pocket to comp us the tickets, but his comp account is down that much which means he won't be able to use the comp himself or comp other more appreciative friends. The tickets have value which she made clear she wanted.

Another time, she and a couple of other friends were going to a show and dinner. She asked me to get some comp coupons for them. I did. Nobody thanked me. I wasn't invited.

Sorry G-Mo. She wanted to go. She's putting no effort into it, she pays the cab.

The sad thing is that we live in this seniors apartment building and we will be neighbors for a long time.

Just because your neighbors doesn't mean you have to be friends. Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.

I asked one of my neighbors to go with me. She likes the shows, I dont have to go alone


I might be more forgiving if I had begged her to come with me, but she hounded me daily to get the tickets. I reminded her several times how expensive they were, but still she hounded me.

These two quotes from separate posts paint a very contradictory picture, which leads me to believe I would need to hear both sides of this story before arriving at an informed conclusion.

These two quotes from separate posts paint a very contradictory picture, which leads me to believe I would need to hear both sides of this story before arriving at an informed conclusion.

Most of the shows are in the $30 price range, so it costs Randy's comp account about $100 for us to have dinner and see a show. I already had tickets to the first show. She picked the second act she wanted to see. But when she said she wanted to see this third act where the tickets are $80 each, I told her that was asking a lot of Randy's generosity. She nagged and whined until I finally broke down and asked for the tickets.

So both statements are correct. In the beginning, I asked her to come with me. This time she asked me to take her.

Someone earlier mentioned sports tickets. If you have the tickets and give them away, that's one thing, but if you give someone a ticket and then they come back for more free tickets, you would get an icky feeling.

All good advice. I can't unfriendly her, but I won't be a close friend. Perhaps I wasn't clear about how Randy gets the tickets and that it actually does cost him over time.

The casino regularly sends out booklets of coupons for $5 of a meal or a table game etc. those are "free" in that you don't do anything to get them, they come in the mail like flyers for the drugstore. Even though I've explained it to her, she might not understand. There is also a handicapped husband lurking in the wings. I sense he's had some input into the cab situation.

Meanwhile, I'm cleaning out closets and hauling usable stuff down to the giveaway table in the lobby. Guess who is taking most of it. :D

How do you think she'd feel if you e-mailed her a link to this thread? :heybaby:

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Just like "Dear Abby"....only this is Dear "Eh-by"

How do you think she'd feel if you e-mailed her a link to this thread? :heybaby:

I would email it to her, but she can't figure out how to read her email and she would call me to help her. Another thorn in my side. I suggested a month ago that she take her computer to the shop and have them figure it out for her. She's not going to forgive me for that any time soon. :D

Maybe I should post a printout in the lobby. :eek:

I would email it to her, but she can't figure out how to read her email and she would call me to help her. Another thorn in my side. I suggested a month ago that she take her computer to the shop and have them figure it out for her. She's not going to forgive me for that any time soon. :D

Maybe I should post a printout in the lobby. :eek:

Well in that case, telling her not to bother and taking someone else can't hurt you none... beejacon

Just because your neighbors doesn't mean you have to be friends. Keep your friends close and your enemies closer.

Ya, I have one of those living next to us.. - we have the bigger property and they have ever since they moved in attempted to take over - even with fences it does not stop them..

Unfortunately - you just can't win at times and you just have to put your foot down and say what you feel - even if it hurts, because walked on / being used hurts even more.

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